Dear Santa, I confess to being slightly shitty this year at the whole Christmas thing…

So last year B was about 5 months old; tiny, immobile and I was on mat leave which meant that apart from being sleep deprived I actually had a fair amount of time. I do actually love Christmas but this year is a whole different playing field and I really need to up my game for next year before Bodes cottons on…

  • Our Christmas Tree is in actual fact no more than a mere Christmas 2015-12-2019.22.19shrub. Since moving house I have no idea where our decorations are so I was very grateful for the salt dough tree object Boden brought home from nursery the other day. I’ve since bought a shit load of lights and tipped them all over it in the hope that it will jazz it up somewhat – the kids are all about the lights anyway. Plus, judging from all these Facebook posts about children mounting Christmas trees I’ve figured that in fact I’m just side swerving the potential for crisis and a trip to A&e – practical parenting.
  • Me and salt dough don’t really get on. I tried to do the whole crafty-mum Christmas decoration thing. Failed. Burnt it. Forgot the actual hanging hole. Maybe I’ll try again next year… maybe I’ll just keep the burnt one and leave it at that. Thank you nursery angels for stepping in.
  • Bodes has eaten quite a few mince pies… I’m expecting a few eye rolls at this for the sheer amount of sugar he will have consumed in doing so. I don’t care. Technically they’re not chocolate and it gets so very boring being the disciplinary cowbag of the house all the time.
  • B doesn’t have a stocking this year – I’m not entirely sure if this is a thing yet at 18 months but I endeavour to improve on this for next year.
  • Called up to book to Santa and his magical, wish-come true grotto today (I figured I still had time)… Missed that boat. Apparently everywhere is either fully booked or now closed as it was the last weekend before Christmas?! I’m wondering whether I can get a husband sized Santa outfit to somehow rectify this situation. Getting him to wear it is probably beyond even my capabilities so maybe I’ll scrap that idea too. Or learn how to photoshop B into a Grotto? Or… maybe I’ll just take him to B&Q and let him run free among the Christmas display for a bit and take a few action shots.
  • For those of you who may have seen my Facebook page, I actually sent Bodes to nursery with broccoli fritters for his party plate – there was literally NOTHING else in the house. Dire.

N.B. These were actually pretty tasty, if you want to give them a go:

One tree of broccoli – chopped and give it a couple of mins in the microwave with a dash of water to soften up.

Chuck it in a bowl with one egg, 40g plain flour, tablespoon of cream cheese, half teaspoon of baking powder, crunch of black pepper, dash of milk and a lot of grated cheese. Blitz it all up and fry off in dollops with a little olive oil on a medium heat. Turn them when bubbles appear on the surface. 

I have however, purchased a cracking Christmas jumper for the little champ which I figured claws back a few points?

So for now, I’m drinking a gin cocktail (totally legit now it’s Christmas) and planning on being a far better Christmas reveler for next year…




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